My Flight Experience

July 2, 2006 at 12:01 AMJoshua Harley

[NOTE: This was written during the flights on 2006-06-30]

Flight #1

Well here I am writing to you from about 37,000 feet... quite the uneventful flight so far. I haven't gotten out my laptop yet, but I just might... Who knows? Well I do... I think. I must say that this flight is quite warm, which is weird because they are usually freezing. (The guy next to me is studying a presentation on ADHD... Or maybe he has it... He keeps looking around suspiciously). This flight lasts about 1 hour and 45 minutes, which (ASSHOLE!!! The fricking guy in front of me just smashed my legs with his seat! To make it worse he just kept throwing his back into it! Weird that h e encountered resistance... I wonder why? Oh yeah! I am sitting here!! Agghhhgghhhgg! No laptop now... *sigh*) is way too long because I am 6'3" (190 cm)... way too warm! Damn we've only been flying for 30 minutes. I think I'll just sit here and listen to my music... Damn hot air is drying out my contacts.

Oooooooh, the captain just came on! He sounds excited today! Cocktails and wine available for $5.00! Some cheap-ass "trail-mix" for $1.00! Correct change please. Ugh.

Thanks to the ASSHOLE in front of me, I can't even put my food tray down! Arggfgfgnbfbfgfhgh. Once again, clueless, he tried to get it even further back... Well guess what AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN! UNLESS YOU BREAK MY LEGS - FUCKER! Aisle seats suck, always getting hit.

Ok, there is this weird lady in row 5 (I'm in 9) that keeps looking back here, popping her head. Like a prairie dog! I'll see if I can get a picture ... It's pretty damn funny!

Ok, I swear that this fucker in front of me is trying his hardest to break my kneecaps! Oh goodie a nice song just came on Kono Sekai No Doko Ka De {somewhere} by Kuwashima Houko, the seiyuu {voice actor} for Filia in Slayers Try and Kasumi in Dead or Alive 2 - 4 (and going). Pretty song, pretty voice and can someone do something about that damn air? It SUCKS that (oh great! 30 minutes left!) this is the same plane that'll take me to Detroit...

We need another seating area for moms and babies! I mean, it sucks that their ears hurt when they pop, so they cry, but my ears hurt from their crying!

Nice! Attempt #4 by the Kneecap Basher! I swear...


Flight #2

Well, we're on our second flight right now, and I actually have room for me to use my laptop, albeit without internet service (kinda sucks, but at 37,000 feet it is understandable) I just spent about 10 minutes trying to get the above paragraphs off of my phone. First problem was I don't have activesync installed on Windows XP MCE yet (on my laptop) so I had to reboot into Windows Vista Beta 2 and use their built in activesync. That was a pain because of how slow it runs on my laptop, installing drivers, and getting pissed at the UAC. NOTE: If you click on it a ton of times, it WILL pop up for every one, it just waits until everything starts working. Pain in the ass I tell you, but not as bad as Mr. Kneecap Basher. This flight we were all put in row 26, which is in the very back. Nice thing is, the guy in front of me hasn't leaned back yet. Bad part, the bathrooms are right here, and man are they busy. (AHHHHHH TURBULANCE ACK ACK - ACK MORE - AHAAAAHAHHHH NOT COOL - I HATE FREEFALLING! That's why I don't do well on rollercosters.) Damn, power-down time.

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Comments (1) -

Some advice for the return trip:

1. Two words: Exit row. Get to the gate early and request first available exit row.
2. Get some alcohol. It's worth the five dollars, I promise.
3. Instead of worrying about the babies, marvel at the fact that you're in a metal tube 37,000 feet above Earth. It can really be quite exhilerating when you think about it.
4. Use the bathroom. Then marvel at the fact that you're pissing 37,000 above Earth. I once pissed somewhere over Greenland. That was fun.
5. Get shorter. It makes the coach seats that much less uncomfortable. If you can't get shorter, refer to #1.

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